I realised that the longer I date the more bitter I become and the more expectations on how a first date should go are built. For example, and I am still convinced this is right, on the first date a guy should pay. And that the first date should not be an activity or an event, just drinks, or a light meal (yes, there's such a thing). No graves late at night, no arcades. A nice quiet place to get to know each other. Especially after an 8 hr. work day.
This story's date was suggested by someone I know and trust so Cardinal Rule #1 was met: the shadchan/it has to know both of us. For some reason I didn't think to look him up on facebook as soon as it was suggested so by the time I got around to doing it it was too late to cancel the date. אין מה להגיד, the guy just wasn't physically attractive to me. But I was going to get made up and smile and make it look like I was putting in effort. Sure enough, when he picked me up, the receding hairline was just like the picture showed and everything else.
We started driving and I noticed we were leaving the Jewish neighbourhood. In fact, we were driving away from all the Jewish neighbourhoods. I decided to keep my mouth shut and see where he was going with this. But after awhile I couldn't help and asked sweetly "So where are we going?" I don't remember his exact wording but he said something about wanting to walk around but maybe not since it was cold and raining. I was never so grateful for rain before. I was not dressed to walk around in cold weather since I thought (okay, fine, I assumed) we would be sitting inside somewhere.
We finally got to a Barnes and Noble and parked. Now I love Barnes and Noble, I could get lost in there for hours every time. But that's just the point, I could get lost in there, meaning, by myself. And the reason for that is because I get lost in the books I read there. [Again, like in all my previous blogs this may sound harsh but this blog is not for tiptoeing around the truth, it's to tell the story as I see it happened] So when a guy takes you on a date to a bookstore and walks around with you, and, I might add, nowhere near the coffee shop part of it, what are you supposed to do? What's that? Talk? Make small talk? Why do I need to walk around a bookshop after an 8 hr day of work when I could sit down and do the same thing with a nice hot drink?
So I innocently steered us towards to Starbucks in the store, and since it was supper time and I was hungry and we were clearly not going out to eat, I asked the woman behind the counter if she knew if any of the pastries were kosher. She bent down and apparently looked it up in some manual, and when she stood up she said that anything labeled "Sweet Stoppe" is kosher. I looked at my date and asked him which one he wanted. But, apparently, he didn't trust the woman behind the counter that the pastries were kosher so he said he wasn't hungry and just ordered a tea. Not wanting to stuff my face alone, I ordered a coffee and no pastry.
After the drinks we walked around a bit more and I saw the bargain books table. One book stood out and the title will explain why: "How to be Single". it was a novel, not a non-fiction book, and it sounded funny. I also picked up a dog magazine and a notepad I needed. We then took a "bathroom break" and I texted all who needed to know (parents, sisters) that this guy was definitely not it. We come out and walk to the nearest section of books: Relationships. I know, classic. One book stands out: "101 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Got Married". We started skimming the table of contents. Sounded pretty good, but I had already taken more than I was allowing myself so I didn't get the book, but I did write down the name of it, just for later. At one point I said "why are we even in this section?", as a joke to lighten a slightly heavy mood, to which he muttered "because it's the closest to the bathrooms". Sheesh!
Once he dropped me off at home i made a beeline for my sister's house at 10 pm, a real Oliver Twist image, "please can i have some food? I haven't eaten since 1 pm and not because i forgot".
Anyway, I think I can say confidently that he had a good time and I definitely didn't suffer, but the bottom line was, his looks and personality were not for me. And I don't mean personality like the part of the person you get to know better, the layers of them, I mean his overall....I dunno, it just wasn't for me.
The End!
No comments:
Post a Comment