You're skyping with someone for 3 months. THREE MONTHS! So basically,
it's not a relationship with a person, but a computer screen. Sounds ideal right? So easy to come up with a lame excuse any time you need to "go".
אז זהו, שלא.
After 3 months, we actually meet in the same country, face to face. I see a person standing, waiting for me in Mamilla. I recognise him from the computer screen but my brain doesn't make the connection. I can't put together the computer screen image and the flesh-and-blood human being in front of me. After awkward "introductions" he asked if I wanted to walk to the Kotel.
Now for those of you who don't know me well, when I used to go on dates I would להשקיע. Makeup, nice outfit, heels etc. And this time was no exception. Now if you're wearing sensible footwear a walk to the kotel from Mamilla really isn't a big deal. But it was cold enough for boots and I was wearing nice ones with heels. I had long lost what little tact I possessed when I began dating so I said "Let's not". Then he played his ace. "But I'm never in the country..." How does one argue with that??? I didn't want it on my conscious that the one time a year he actually came to Israel, to see his parents, I deprived him of a visit to the kotel.
Fine. we walked there, we each did our business on our respective sides of the mechitza (I'm dying to know what he davened for then) and proceeded to walk back to Mamilla. On the rather silent way back he had the decency to buy me a freshly squeezed drink.
We get back to Mamilla and I decided to stand my ground and suggested we sit down to eat something (I wasn't suffering through this date without a meal that was for sure!). I felt irritated that things were going so badly. What do you say to someone you know everything about? Or at least everything you'd find out on a date. To his credit, he really did try. I could practically see the wheels turning in his head looking for topics of converstaion but what came out was question, answer, question answer.
I think the mutual relief was almost palpable when we decided to finish up for the day.
I don't know what my family was expecting when I came back but they definitely got their desired dose of drama. "I never want to see him again!" Those near and dear whose opinion I valued reminded me that I had never given any guy a full 3 months and it would be a major shame to let it go after one bad date.
So we decided to carry on. After all, if by the end of the week it didn't work out, he was going back to his life and me to mine and our paths would never cross. We decided that since this could potentially get more serious and since my parents were both in the country, our parents should meet. In the off chance a proposal was down the very-long road it wouldn't do for us to get engaged without the parents having met.
To my American readers, we all know what it means when the parents meet. Some call it a vort. But no matter how many times I explained the above logic to my parents, they couldn't grasp that this meeting was not to declare an engagement. The fact that I didn't even want to go down to see the guy when they came didn't convince them either.
It was awkward for me and him. We didn't want to be together just then but soon my father was ushering us off to "have a date".
As the title suggests, this relationship ended well. We are now happily married.
But this one will forever be my worst first date ever!
P.S. fear not loyal readers! Even though I had a happy ending I will keep the stories coming as I remmeber them.
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